Apollo, p.15
Apollo, page 15
“No. No. Nooo!” Lauren crumpled to the ground.
Apollo was gone. She held her head in her hands and recalled the god-like creature in full armor pulling him back from her with his long, brightly gleaming sword. Whoever it was wore a gold star on a crown set high on his head. Apollo didn’t mess up, he was in deep trouble, and it was her fault. She asked him to help her and now Apollo, the only angel she knew, her guardian, her… What was he to her? A mere boyfriend, a partner, or a lover but they hadn’t had sex yet. Could she venture to call him a lover? What did it matter now, he wasn’t with her anymore.
She covered her eyes and bawled like a baby into them, letting her tears run all over her hands and stream wildly down her face. Why did she ask him? Why did she corral him into her petty human troubles?
Why did he fall for it? Because he loved her. Apollo. Dragging her feet from the small kitchen, she fell forward onto her dining table, wallowing in her misery and grief. She wanted him back. She’d do anything to get him back. What could she do? What about telepathy? Could he still hear her, or did they take that away from him too? Was he still alive or did they torture him or send him into the black hole with Brandon?
“Nooo!” she wailed aloud. She had to think of something, and come up with a plan, but what? She didn’t know or understand angel hierarchy. Who was the man with the crown? That was important because if she could get through to him, she might be able to get Apollo back. The being who captured Apollo wasn’t male or female from what she could tell, more asexual. However, its strong features, jawline, defined arms and legs leaned more toward male, especially if the voice she heard belonged to it. Who was he and could she talk to him, get ahold of him and would he understand her plight? Not likely unless he also had a human mate which by the look of him, seemed near impossible. There was an air of importance and strength around him, as he held back her guardian, coldly keeping him away from her.
“Why did they take you away and from me?” She rolled her forehead back and forth across her arms. “Why?”
The night with Delia was ruined and canceled before it began. Lauren tried to compose herself, but she was a mess. She made up a lie to Delia that Apollo broke it off with her just in case he didn’t come back. She couldn’t explain any further because she didn’t know what to say. What possible excuse could she come up with for his sudden departure when she was the one who sent him away with her pleas for help? If she never asked, he wouldn’t have interfered and broken rule number ten, whatever that was.
She attempted to reach out to Apollo that night and every night for several weeks until her heart gave up hope and her anger surfaced. She even tried to contact the man with the golden crown, attempting to remember details of what he looked like but as the days passed, his image faded too. She made up lies to keep herself from hurting, falsehoods she hoped one day to believe. Apollo didn’t answer her or contact her because he didn’t care. He was gone, forever, and she needed to move on. He didn’t love her, and he never did. If he loved her, he would’ve contacted her or found a way back to her. The lies kept the guilt inside of her from surfacing and allowed her to get out of bed and go through the motions one more day, but she knew eventually she wouldn’t be able to escape the truth—that whatever happened to him was her fault and she missed him badly.
Lauren cried herself to sleep every night, tears bursting forth at odd times throughout her days, causing her to hide from people behind closed doors or run for shelter into the restaurant’s employees only, single-stall bathroom. She arose tired, emotionally and physically weakened on a daily basis, and wept into the long hours of the night after trying again to contact her once beloved guardian angel who rewarded her with abject silence. When almost two months later, the phone rang with Kitty Kat on the line, Lauren jumped at the chance to get out of the dreary apartment that reminded her of him. She vowed to move forward with her life and to never look back.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
“So, what’re we doing tonight?” Lauren turned to her former partner in crime.
Kitty Kat was beautiful and tall, with soft, long locks of brown hair cascading almost to her waist. She covered her dusty pink lips in ruby red gloss, lined her eyebrows to perfect arches, and globbed enough mascara onto her eyelashes to add extra thickness and length without any falsies needed. Lauren’s false eyelashes, on the other hand, stayed in her drawer untouched. She never quite got the concept of how to apply them and after one half attempt to do so, she stowed them permanently away.
Lauren looked over her friend with admiration. Kitty Kat was a sight to behold but she wasn’t frail or a pushover. Oh no, it was the exact opposite. Kat, as she was affectionately known to her friends, was a broad-shouldered, buxom, freight train but that didn’t mean she wasn’t into kinky. Oh no, Kat, whose real name was Katerina, was into all kinds of sex. She tried everything and loved almost all of it. Lauren, on the other hand, had her preferences and wasn’t as open to new experiences as Kitty Kat but that didn’t mean Lauren was a prude. She had her own style, her swag. Kat had hers and that suited each just fine. Kat was the first to come to her defense when a male became overbearing or domineering. She and Lauren fought their way out of several compromising positions that neither wanted. They had each other’s back in the clubs and at Layla’s, which was important.
For the first time in five months, Lauren was heading out on the town, prowling with her friend, and if she was lucky, by the end of the night her former eighteen men she’d slept with would be a brand-new number nineteen. Twenty, if she was lucky. She wasn’t searching for love. She already experienced true love and she lost him, forever. Tonight, her goal was a distraction from the continuing ache in her heart and the anguish-filled nightmares that accompanied her sleep. An image of Apollo popped into her head. She recalled a past memory of him, her heart cringing with the vivid images flashing across her mind. He surprised her a little over a year ago, by celebrating her birthday, a day forgotten by so many in her past, including her mom. Apollo remembered it and surprised her with a Mylar balloon and a cake. It was unexpected and sweet of him to do. She never did anything for her birthday but moped around and went to sleep early. Her birthday wasn’t important and not special, but Apollo said it was.
“It’s just another day, not a big deal.” Lauren protested.
“Yes, it is. You were born on this day.”
She rolled her eyes.
“Just accept my gifts. I love you.” He lowered his lips to her ear. “You are special to me. There is no one else like you.” He nibbled her lower ear lobe and licked the tip to Lauren’s surprise. “My beautiful wildflower, how do you not know how truly beautiful you are to me?”
She broke down into sobs while he held her.
“No one’s ever done anything like this for me before. In fact, no one’s ever done anything nice without expecting something from me.” Her voice cracked.
“I know.” He kissed her forehead and held her against his chest. “But I do expect something from you. I expect your love and for you to love me, eventually.”
That was the rub. She learned to love him, and she expressed her love for him when he left. He heard it too, for he reached for her with a happy grin spread wide across his lips until the being with the crown held him back. However, Apollo was gone, and she had to move on with her life.
“Wildflower.”
Her hand on the front door, Lauren whipped her head back into the room and searched it. “Did you say something, Kat?”
“No.”
“Did you hear something?” Her friend’s confused look prompted her to speak.
“I thought I heard someone say something. Something from the past. Wildflower.”
“What the hell is that? Some kind of flower or something?”
Lauren nodded. “A beautiful one, I’m told.”
“Huh. It would make an interesting pet name.”
Lauren couldn’t answer. She remained speechless. half-heartedly scanning the room, knowing it could only be one person who said that particular word. One of two scenarios could’ve happened, either he was there, invisible to her eyes or he sent the word telepathically. Regardless, it meant he was okay. After further contemplation about what she witnessed, she gave up her search and walked out the door, crossing her fingers that Apollo was safe.
How did she find herself in such predicaments? Granted she was the one who orchestrated this whole thing, convincing, cajoling, and even guiding Kat into the cab, frustrated by the whole turn of events with Apollo and ready to show him she was moving on. Was she? That was the irony of it all. She wanted to—no—she was going to get back at him, especially if he was coming back to Earth for her. She wanted him to find her intertwined within someone else’s legs. Not that she and Apollo had much of that though there was one time they were stretched across her couch… She shook the image out of her head. She wasn’t here for him. She was here for her, her independence and freedom. However, Apollo still haunted her. He consumed countless minutes of her days and wasted hours of her sleep. The reason why she was standing outside a motel door confused her. No one could top Apollo, no matter what she tried to do. Why did she remain staring at the large gold numbers at the door?
Apollo wasn’t here and there was no guarantee he was back even after she heard her pet name whispered into her living room back home. She spent most of the night contemplating if she heard her name or if she imagined it, the truth of what happened was unknown to her. Also, if Apollo came back, would he return to be with her, after her request had him summoned by the Council? The thought of Apollo with another female shortened her breaths. A sharp pain tunneled through her insides when the image of him kissing someone else and loving another entered her mind. Sure he loved human beings, but she was special, right? Now that he was captured by the Council, who knew what changes were in store for her? She trembled, afraid she’d never see him again when she wanted to be with him, forever, if that was possible. She wanted Apollo back. She couldn’t give up not until he told her there was no hope.
She and Kat split up earlier in the night, Kat going in the opposite direction with two men, hinting at a ménage a trois experience. The handsome, clean-cut stranger Lauren accompanied was presently paying for the motel room. She expected to have fun tonight in the arms of another but was that what she wanted? Images of Apollo and her, together, flooded her mind: the beautiful carriage ride, the intimate evenings dining out in high-quality restaurants, and her sheltered within Apollo’s capable arms, being kissed and caressed, his lips and hands worshipping her thoroughly, his words of love whispered into her ear with each hot breath across her skin. No, she didn’t want this stranger, she wanted Apollo—damn it. She couldn’t go through with it. When her date appeared, his eyes half-mast with desire, she apologized and shoved the motel money at him, and bid him goodnight, thankful he didn’t attempt to force himself on her. In the cab back to her apartment, she wondered if she made a mistake, but it didn’t matter now. She could never love another, not when Apollo existed. He ruined her for all other men.
She fumbled for the keys to her door when something caught her eye. Bending forward, she picked up the single long reed holding several beautiful blossoms with various shades of purple.
“What is this?” She looked around her but found no one in the hallway. “Who left it?”
Searching for it online later, she found it was a Lyreleaf sage—a wildflower common to her area.
“Apollo?” She turned in her seat and whispered his name out into the darkness of the room. “Did you send me this? I miss you. I hope you’re okay.” She lowered her eyes. Silence. That’s all she ever received in response to her one-sided conversations, asking for him to speak to her. “I love you.” She lifted her head and stared up at the ceiling. “I miss you, my sweet angel. I didn’t do anything tonight because I’m still hoping for you, waiting for you to come back to me. I want you, no one else. I hope you’re okay.” She lifted out of her seat and shuffled into the bedroom, a small pain of concern and worry chiseling away at her insides, stabs jabbing into her heart.
As her head hit the pillow, she could’ve sworn she heard Apollo calling her name. She whispered his with a request: “Are you here? Please don’t tease me.” She closed her eyes and suffered painstaking silence and unfulfilled dreams that night, searching desperately for something but not finding it.
For the next several months, Lauren either heard Apollo, or she was slowly going insane. His messages to her, if you could call them that, were sporadic, singular words. She never received another flower, but the crazy part was sometimes she’d see one next to her out of the corner of her eye, but when she turned her head to take a closer look there was nothing beside her. Strange. His messages became clearer when she did something she never thought she’d ever do—attend church. She only went because she was curious about Apollo, wanted to know more about him, and yearned for him to be with her. It was Christmas Eve and a friend from work invited her to a candlelight vigil. This was the time of year Lauren anticipated spending with him and she missed him, dearly. Thoughts of him wormed their way throughout her workdays, weakening her to dry heaves while at work. She spent many nights with a pint of chocolate ice cream in her lap and tears staining her pillow. His absence sent her into a tailspin, but she held onto the notion that maybe, just possibly, he might show up or talk to her during a church service. Since he was an angel, church service should mean something to him, right? She was about to find out.
Her virgin feet crossed the threshold of the church doors and she shuddered away to the side, worried she shouldn’t be inside the building. Would lightning blast her from the sky or would the being with the gold crown, whom she now knew from her countless musings was an angel, sweep her up to bear judgment from The Council too?
She sat in a pew in the back of the magnanimous two-storied church, fearful someone would single her out as a heathen. However, the brief time she spent alone in the church until crowds of people stampeded in, allowed her to reflect upon the shock she experienced several days ago when she, almost literally, ran into Brandon on her way out of a supermarket. She replayed the details in her mind.
“Sorry,” Brandon muttered, moving away from her.
“Brandon?” Lauren staggered back. She eyed him with her mouth gaping open.
“I’m sorry, do I know you?” He turned with a start. His eyes roamed over her.
“You don’t remember me?”
“Should I?’ Instinctively, she took a step back when he stepped closer. He didn’t seem to notice.
“And Delia? Are you still with her?”
“Who?” He shook his head, his eyebrows drawing together in a thin line. The poor man looked genuinely confused.
“You are Brandon, right? Works at Mike’s Oil and Tire.”
“Yes. Ma’am, I’m not sure how you know me. Maybe I’ve seen you there, is that it? Are you a customer?” He bent one arm back and massaged his shoulder. “I’m sorry, I don’t know you, but should I? Have I met you somewhere before?”
“Uh.” She shook her head. “I’m sorry I must’ve gotten you confused with someone else.”
“With another Brandon who works at Mike’s Oil and Tire? Miss, miss…”
Lauren scuffled out the door before he could ask her any more questions. He called out to her. She kept moving, breaking into a speed walk until she got to her car. Her heart flip-flopped with fear. Brandon was supposed to be gone, living out the rest of his day in the abyss Apollo sent him to but here he was, shopping at the local supermarket, a place he’d never be caught dead in before. That was strange yet what confused her the most, was the fact that he didn’t remember her or know who Delia was. Did Delia know he was back in town? Lauren had to find out. It seemed as if part of his memory had been erased yet not all of it for his name remained the same and he even worked at the same place. Still, other things had changed and maybe for the better. Delia was safe. However, if Brandon was back, where was Apollo? Did he return too? If so, why didn’t he contact her or let her know?
She shoved open her purse, pulled her keys out, and looked over at the supermarket to find Brandon didn’t follow her. She blew out a sigh of relief and steadied her hand to unlock the door. Slamming it shut, she turned the key in the ignition, threw the car into reverse, and sped out of the lot.
“Lauren.”
The deep male voice knocked her back into reality. It was subtle but she heard it between the loud instruments playing on the church’s stage.
Apollo? She sent the message through telepathy and waited to find out if it worked.
“What are you doing here?”
It is you! Where are you? Are you coming back?
“I can’t talk for long.”
Please tell me you’re okay.
“I’m okay.”
Really?
“Lauren, why are you here?”
I miss you. I hoped you’d be here.
A new song started up and she remained silent, unable to hear him over the loud tones onstage. The notes of the uplifting song moved through her, the corners of her mouth rose into a smile, and she closed her eyes and hummed along with the tune. Her hair lifted and fell back, and she felt a gentle caress move down the length of her upper arm.
I love you. She sent the message in the middle of the song, smiling as her heart filled to capacity and lifted with merriment. She bent her head to her left, just in case, and smiled when her hair was brushed aside, and she was rewarded by butterfly kisses in the most sensitive, erogenous areas near her throat. His attention to her sent pleasant jolts straight to her private spots, building up the yearning for him she held deep inside.
My angel, we shouldn’t be… Not in the church.
